First and foremost, Christmas is a Christian holiday celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ, and I do not believe in God. To me, it feels strange to celebrate a religious holiday of a religion I do not follow - it would be like a Christian celebrating Eid or Yom Kippur, you just wouldn't do it. However, when I mention this as my reasoning, I'm met with a lot of backlash because it seems that a huge percentage of people who celebrate Christmas are Atheists and have conformed to the holiday for other reasons. Whatever your beliefs or choices, they are yours alone to make, and I respect that...but it seems that if you, like me, stray away from the mainstream, you are the one in the wrong, which I do not accept.
To call me a Grinch or a Bah Humbug because I choose not to participate in something I don't want to or believe in is hurtful and judgmental. It seems that, as I am white British, Christened as a baby, and as I attended a Catholic first school (as a non-Catholic), it is expected of me to follow the crowd. I never have and never will do anything to fit in.
Next, those who are not religious and can't accept why I don't 'do' Christmas like them, love to bill it as a time to 'eat, drink and be merry', to spend time with family and of course give presents. Why on Earth wouldn't I want to partake in that?! Well, let me tell you that not everyone likes those things.
As an undiagnosed Autistic child, I didn't have dinner on Christmas for a good few years because I was so stressed that I was poorly. I hate getting and opening gifts; the unexpectedness and being very aware of my reaction make the whole thing very unenjoyable, despite my love of giving gifts. Big gatherings, parties, drunk people and overindulgence in general are also things I am not a fan of in the slightest. Add all of that together, with the hustle and bustle of the whole month, overconsumption, the vast amount of waste everything, and the devastating impact this one day has on the planet - I'd rather not partake at all, thank you!
If those reasons aren't enough, how about these?
- We don't have a conventional family dynamic. There is only Mr H and me, our pets, and my parents. No siblings, aunties, uncles, cousins or grandparents. My whole life, Christmas was my parents, me, and my maternal Grandparents, so when we lost them, it was no longer the same.
- It's yet another time of year that people start with their stupid firework malarky! If you don't already know how much I hate fireworks, you must be new here.
- Lights in all the trees/Woodland light trails make me so sad! Have your home decorations, town and city lights, but when all the trees are being filled with wires and bright bulbs, where do you think the wildlife that lived there go? Not to mention the monetary and environmental costs to have them on all day, every day, for weeks on end.
- Chopping down trees for a couple of weeks with it indoors seems counterintuitive. Why not rent or buy one that can be replanted outside to continue growing and enjoy again in years to come or at least let it benefit nature once you are done with it. If this holiday is about God and God apparently created everything on Earth, I personally think he'd be sad that all the trees were being killed...
- ...not to mention the animals. Obviously, I am vegan, and that's fine for me. However, it is more than soul-destroying to know how many of 'God's Creatures' are sacrificed for humans to stuff their faces in the name of Jesus birthday. Truly heartbreaking.
- Presents are weird. If you see something in a shop and it reminds you of someone you love, you can buy it and give it to them at anytime throughout the year, you know? Presents shouldn't be expected, an obligation, a trade, or cause debt to get. They should be thoughtful, something the recipient will treasure and be given in love.
So what do we do? Are we just sad little people in a depression bubble until the red, green and gold are binned come New Year? Do we sit and fume at what other people choose to do, or tell them that they need to change the way they live life, as we are so often told?
No. In fact, December is a month of calm, rest, dark evenings and slow days. We celebrate the Winter Solstice and are mindful of the year we've had and the year to come. Not everyone has the luxury of getting time off work, and some people work in crazy busy environments during this time, so it's also important to take the time when you can to get out into nature to revel in and appreciate stillness, quiet and breathe fresh air.
I'm not saying I don't moan about how the shops are full of tat from November 1st or how we struggle to get our food shop, but not celebrating doesn't affect us as you'd expect. We have our own traditions and are very happy with how we've chosen to navigate life.
As I type this, I am well aware of the people who do struggle at this time of year, though. Those who have lost family, who may not have any family or even a roof over their heads. No matter the reason, it can be an incredibly difficult season, and I wish people would be a little more mindful of the world around them. Be kind as your God would have wanted.
So, as the day approaches, I wish all of you who do celebrate a lovely day, however you spend it and to those who do not have a restful Thursday!
